Firewater? Really?

It's always important to examine prejudices to see if there's any truth to them, or if it's just mean-spirited people spreading rumors. Like the idea of Indians and their firewater. Let's face it, that assertion in this day and age is just naked bigotry.

So the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services keeps records on this sort of thing. Actually, their subdivision, the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) tracks it, and then releases their data. According to a survey the released in June, American Indians and Alaska Natives had a lower rate of alcohol usage than the national average. Mind you, that's past month alcohol usage.

It's a mixed result. Although the past month usage is lower than the national average, the rate of binge alcohol and illicit drug use is higher than the national average, with one in eight American Indian or Alaska Native adults seeking treatment at a speciality facility for alcohol or drug use. Make of that what you will.

I Love You, Man

I'd also love it if you drank less. And I'd love some acronyms, too. Actually, I'd love a lot of acronyms. Can anyone make that happen?

The University of Texas can make all that happen, and more. Their School of Public Health conducted a research study that threw around more acronyms than a GAO rundown of NIST RFP audits, kicking around acronyms like SMART (Southern Methodist Alcohol Research Trial), MIF (motivational interviewing with feedback), NIAAA (National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism) and e-CHUG (don't ask). Their claim is that individualized feedback is effective at stopping alcohol abuse in college.

According to this study, people in college don't realize that their peers drink less than they appear to. Sure, the rumors abound that college campuses are packed with drunken yahoos, but this study claims that there's less drinking going on than people realize, and by educating students about the behavior of their peers, they'll realize that it's okay to drink less.

I suppose that way of thinking is fine, if you're content to follow the herd. Tonight, I'm going to raise a glass to the outliers of society, who not only drink more than their peers, but who are also proud of it.

OMG! DRAMA!

Does talking about your problems with someone make them better, or worse? Actually, go back a step. How to you talk about your problems with people? Are you trying to find solutions, or do you just want people to pay attention to you while you complain?

Remember all the drama of high school? The endless discussion about who got in a fight/started dating/etc.? I can only imagine how much worse it is with crap like twitter and instant/text messaging. So, Stony Brook University started looking at what kind of effects it has on them (and went with the exciting study name "Clarifying co-rumination: Associations with internalizing symptoms and romantic involvement among adolescent girls").

Their studies show that frequent discussion of problems can lead to depression or anxiety. I'm not sure they aren't putting the cart before the horse, though. Isn't it equally possible that depressed or anxious people spend more time running to their friends to talk about how worried they are?

When Is Intolerance a Good Thing?

According to health experts, having a high alcohol tolerance is a bad sign. I disagree. As we should be tolerant of others who may have different religious, social, or romantic values, we should also be tolerant of alcohol and all of the friendly pranks it can play on our minds, hearts, and livers.

Like most forms of tolerance, alcohol tolerance is easiest to teach to the young. Studies show that binge drinking at an early age can lead to increased alcohol tolerance later on in life. What better way to prepare your children for the rigors of college life than by giving them a celebratory six pack every time they bring home a good report card?

Okay, I'm just kidding (to a point). Binge drinking children aren't cool. But I also think that there's an unnecessary hate out there for having a high alcohol tolerance. Alcohol is our misunderstood friend. Remember, Science has proven that it's better to keep drinking than to stop.

Keep that in mind when you're out having fun tonight. Happy New Year!

Fat Chicks Gone Wild

Obese women just can't control themselves. That's what they're claiming at the University of Alabama at Birmingham. According to their studies, obese women have "a more feeble impulse control."

It's back to delay discounting. UAB thinks that obese women aren't able to do it as effectively. I guess you could make an argument that the two are linked. After all, the ability to put off present (food) rewards in favor of long term (health) benefits would explain the weight gain. Still, I love eating, hate exercising, and don't think about the future consequences of my current meals, but I wouldn't say that I have poor impulse control.

Then again, I haven't been subjected to a medical study like UAB's. They determined how effectively the participants could delay their rewards by offering them cash now or more cash later. I would totally participate in medical studies for cash, no matter how quickly they paid me.

Pediatricians Make Lousy Bartenders

Look, drunks make lousy parents. I'm not going to argue that. However, I am willing to discuss the level of intervention that the state should take when it comes to identifying and intervening when it is suspected that a parent has a drinking problem.

No, I'm not writing about something that happened to me (yet). I'm talking about the goody two-shoes parents who told Children's Hospital Boston that it's okay to get screened for alcohol abuse while they're taking their child to the doctor. Of the 879 parents asked, 90% were open to being asked about their alcohol use.

The problem with alcohol screening is that the thresholds are set way too low. This study found that one in every nine parents were found to have a "positive alcohol screen," and 75% of the parents with a positive screen were willing to be screened for alcohol problems during the visit--probably because they didn't know they'd be "problem" cases.

Then the researchers launched further attacks, raising the possibility that the parents who declined the screening were probably also drunks who knew they'd fail the test. If you're not guilty, you have nothing to hide, right? (/sarcasm)

Yes, alcoholics bad, responsible parents good. Still, they've got no right poking into my business, and they can take my ice-cold Schlitz when they pry it out of my ice-cold (dead) hand!

Are You Genetically Reckless, or Behaviorally?

So, children of parents who smoke are more impulsive and more likely to take risks. In fact, both the children and their parents are more impulsive, according to Nationwide Children's Hospital.

It's all about your "delay discounting" ability, which is fancy talk for being able to put off a small reward in the present for a greater reward in the future (although in the case of smoking, it's more like ditching a small reward in the present to avoid a massive punishment in the future, but who am I to argue with science?). The cigarette-smoking parents want their rewards right here and now; it's why they smoke. The study is showing that apples don't fall far from their respective trees since the children of smokers are also choosing the immediate rewards.

Of course, they left off the crucial question: do they make these choices because they were raised that way, or is it part of their genetic makeup? Would it have made a difference if they had laid down some ground rules?

I can put off something good in the present if I'm sure there's something great in store for the future, but I think it's something my parents taught me.

What about you? Where do you think it comes from?

But Binge Drinking Seemed Like Such a Good Idea

I know, I know, you're stunned to hear that binge drinking could be bad for your health. Still, it's shocking but true, and proven by Loyola University that binge drinking can mess with your bones. According to the study, alcohol "disturbs" the genes necessary to maintain your skeletal health.

Oh sure, you're staving off lung cancer, but you're also risking brittle bones when you drink. To me, the phrase "alcohol-induced bone loss" sounds pretty grim, and while I'd welcome the chance to have my bones replaced with more efficient, more durable plastic versions, I don't think that medical science is at that stage yet.

That's why I take calcium supplements. Hey, if you wash them down with White Russians, the milk gives your bones an extra boost as well, right?

Malt Liquor Is Absorbed Differently (And Awesomely)

Thanks, Science! Researchers have been loading up African-American youths with malt liquor or a mixture of alcohol and diet Sprite. It's great to see science continually going against existing stereotypes.

Anyway, they were getting these kids youths drunk to study how quickly the body absorbed the alcohol. The malt liquor was actually absorbed slower, with blood alcohol concentration peaking 28 minutes after they finished the malt liquor, compared with the soda drink that made it peak 5 minutes earlier.

They're not really sure what that proves, but I'd like to know if the diet soda could help the body metabolize the liquor faster. The whole thing just seems odd.

Oh, by the way. That malt liquor used in the study? It was Olde English.

When Addiction Turns Deadly

First, it turns out that Missouri has an impressive program in place for helping problem gamblers help themselves. In 1996, they were the first state to implement an exclusion program, and it currently allows people to ask to have themselves banned from casinos. Expect Las Vegas to implement a similar program sometime between when they can figure out how to make money out of it and never.

Now, researchers have been studying some of these people who are self-reporting themselves as problem gamblers. They found that older problem gamblers are three or four times more likely to request a self-ban because they are worried that they will kill themselves. So, either older problem gamblers are suicidal, or they're drama queens.

Addicted Kids Become Addicted Adults

Adolescents are more likely to become addicted to drugs than adults, according to a recent study. Researchers at Rockefeller University found this out by getting mice addicted to powerful prescription painkillers. Hooray, science!

The idea is that due to the still-developing brain chemistry of adolescents, they are more vulnerable to having their mental makeup permanently altered by foreign substances. This can lead to bona fide dependency, actual physical addiction, which stays with them for the rest of their lives.

That's why it's important to keep kids off drugs. Of course, just because you lay down some ground rules early on, that won't keep your kids from developing drug habits as adults. Just ask Rush Limbaugh about that.